Some lessons learnt living the American dream

-It does not take long for it to switch to a nightmare esp. when your laundry piles up, heating bills give you mini heart-attacks and the tax man comes and swoops away a good chunk of your bank account as end-of-year dues .
-As long as you don’t own a gas-guzzling SUV (or worse, a Hummer)-the big deal folks make about rising gas prices is just a case of over-blown hysteria.
-You can never go wrong with the following safe conversation topics: the weather, Monsoon Wedding (everyone and their next-door neighbors have watched it) and the current state of the economy.
-All bills get split. In the middle. There are never those uncomfortable moments at the end of a meal when everyone is wondering who will pay. Restaurants happily accept up to 6 credit cards sometimes!
-You always walk on the right side of the road. And you thank folks if they give you way. Otherwise you’re a boor having a bad day.
-Television here sucks. Most days anyway. Unless you enjoy hearing about how a lost cat made national news.
-If you do not like the weather here, wait ten minutes.
-The sales here are REAL sales. Not a gimmick to get rid of lousy stock that no one was buying anyway. Nor are they ‘marked-up mark-down’ events. It’s worth waiting for a sale here. They rock!
-When in doubt, stock up on frozen food. It can be a life-saver.
-The portion sizes in restaurants here are sometimes enough to feed a small country. You are NOT supposed to eat it all. That’s why they have ‘boxes’. Use them.
-Everyone travels on the few (and therefore highly revered) long weekends. Make travel plans way in advance, unless you have too much of the green stuff to throw around.
-Indian grocery stores always play songs from an era you probably never saw/care to remember. Be prepared for painful songs from forgettable movies. It’s just how things work.
-A parantha here is just a nan masquerading under a new name. Grin and bear it.
-It's easy to forget that you have neighbors. If you see them once in the course of your stay, its probably enough.